Big Cute Beach Girl

Summer, I didn't stop blogging just sort of lost interest in it for a minute....I'll try to do better.

** Pop tarts and ice cream are my new fat girl favorite dessert. Yep, stupid Pop tart cartoon commercial of some kids making ice cream sandwiches with two tarts and some ice cream has got my fat ass hooked on that shit. Crap!

** Bought a third vehicle and decided to get one off Craigslist. Yep, bought a van from this family even after they told me that the steering fluid had just started leaking. Cost my dumb ass 540.00 dollars on top of the money I spent to purchase the damn Mexican Hoopie Van. I do love it though, I drive it a couple of days a week just so it's not just sitting and the other days I drive my Cruiser. Love, love, love the Hooptie Van.

** Have decided to spend every Saturday and Sunday at the pool, I pay a pretty penny to live in this subdivision and we should be utilizing the pool. I mean I pack a cooler with snacks and drink. Take my umbrella and set up camp right at the waters edge, I'm tan as a bitch and I'm relaxed as a bitch. Best thing I've ever done for myself.
** My knee is finally to the point where it doesn't hurt every day. Damn that shit only took a year. It will be a year ago July 1st that I nailed a double fat girl tuck and flip out fall at work and it's been the worse freaking injury I've ever had in my life.

** My facial scar where I had Suzie Cyst removed actually has heal all cute and it looks like a dimple on my right cheek, When I smile it looks exactly like a laugh line that was meant to be there all along.

** We were entertaining the idea of renting a historic home from a lady that at first meeting seemed really nice and the house had a lot of charm. Course that is once you got past the fact that it didn't have a dishwasher, a garbage disposal, ice maker, and only one bathroom. Wtf? This would have been like living on Little House on the Prairie only without hot ass Micheal Landon sleeping there. I backed out after I called her to tell her that the stove tried to kill Kenny by shooting sparks of fire out the back at him while he was on the floor trying to clean the baseboards and she was all, "Um, I'll send Sears out to check it out. I was all, "They are coming out to bring a new stove and take this crapping one to the dump, right?" She actually told me that she would have to think about buying a new one and get back with me. Oh no you don't, I cancelled our verbal agreement right there on the spot. Thank God I hadn't signed a lease with the Slum Lord Lady. It also didn't help that my coworker found a shit bucket load of these light orbs in the photos that I had taken of the house and we all know just how I feel about fuckig freaky light orb or ghosts of any kind. Yeah someone was all, "Girl that house was built in 1930? You know somebody died there." That closed the deal for me. I don't do ghost. Clearly have seen way too many scary movies.

** Janice Dickinson from 'I'm a celebrity, get me out of here' is a cracked out skank whore with a huge mouth. I mean she is a total waste of space on earth. I can't freaking stand to listen to her annoying ass voice any longer. And her face doesn't do much for me either. I can't stand that woman. I need to go to church.
** I put a washer and dryer on Craigslist this morning, and they sold in 7 minutes. Course then I got 567 calls for the rest of the day before I found the time to go back on there and delete my ad. My Adirondack chairs sold in 11 minutes then the guy came out and tried his damn

est to get me to take less for them. Um, sorry dry humper it's not gonna happen, I freaking love Craigslist....where else can you find a job, a man, a dog, a house, a hooptie van, and a sectional? No where but there bitches.

** I also put 18 of my big girl tops on Ebay yesterday. I'm so hooked on that shit now. My mom has created a monster. I love having people bid on my stuff. Love, love, love it.